Headband.

It's a beautiful sunnny day here at the manor... and I'm sitting  inside at the computer.  WHAT?  Yes.  It's Monday.  I told myself I will take this precious time (while Z is at school - the precious 2.5 hours) and pay bills, do laundry, etc. etc.  And I am.  Bills- Check!  Laundry - in process - check!

I have the windows open (40 degrees, yo! Spring is coming!)

I have Pandora blarring.

But I had to take this minute to update...  remember... make a mental (and now forever, electronic) note.

"Look what my Mom made for me!"

...said Zoey as she climbed out of the car today in front of the preschool.  She was showing her friends and her teacher the Hello Kitty headband that I "made."  She continued to explain and show... very proudly. 

It's simple, really.  We have been recycling the little HK bow that came on a headband that Gma Pat gave her a few weeks ago.  Each time the little plastic band breaks, we move the bow to a new headband.  This morning it happend again...  stuck in her long hair.  frustrated.  pulling.  SNAP!

It was her idea this time to improve the purple sparkly one that I had bought her for valentine's day...  the one that she has never worn because - DUH - there's no Hello Kitty (or Barbie or Dora or Minnie Mouse or any of the things she likes or could like).  Bingo.

Except this time it wasn't simply adding the bow... we had to take off my original super glue fix of before - disassemble said purple sparkly one...  swap Miss Kitty...  find new ribbon... yadda yadda.  Nothing too major, really.  But she watched me this morning and evidentally it made an impact.

This time I made the headband.  Made it for her. 

Yes, it really is the little things in life.  Not even the headband.  ...

Her voice.
Her words.  Her words strung together in her own way. 
Her own thoughts.
Our time together.

Sometimes I fear getting caught up in the laundry.  the bills. sweeping. cleaning. text messages. dinner making.  altogether doing.  day in and out.

I fear she feels that we aren't really spending time together.  I fear the time eating lunch together watching Sid, the Science Kid isn't quality.  That building puzzles on the floor isn't as creative as when she builds amazing forts in the front room with her dad. 

Or worse, that the times when I yell or get frustrated will be sealed into her memory far longer than the cuddles at bedtime. 

And then I take a damn mintue and listen to her.  watch her. 

It's all beautiful.  It's all ok. 

...

John and I went to a big fancy event on Saturday....  it was really nice.  I hope to write about it - get back at this thing.... as it feels good to write again... 

Anyhoo, at the event, someone asked me what I was up to these days... what I did now... as we hadn't really talked in years. 

"I'm at home," I said. 

"Good for you," he said.  And I really think he meant it.  His working wife and mother of their two kids standing right next to me. 

And then he proceeded to tell me that if I ever wanted to do anything besides "be just a mom" I could call him for x, y, z... work.  Quickly covering his ass about "well, not just a mom..." and so on.  This exact thing has happened a few times in the last four and a half years.  This time, however, I'm pretty sure was the first time I had no desire to be more than "just a mom."

Just as my baby is transforming into a free-thinking, lovable person of the exterior world at large.

Just as I am allowing myself to accept the flowing praise of my husband and partner.

Just as I can really see the results of the work that I do. 

It's a constant struggle in my own mind - mom, wife, college grad, artist, perfectionist, designer, writer, procrastinator, serial volunteer, and on and on... 

The one thing I am not... a race car driver.  Time to go to school for pick up.  ;) 

Laughing so hard!

Thankful today for belly laughs....  Laughing so hard that you almost fall off of the table.  (Table?!  Yep, Zoey likes to sit on tables now...  since she started preschool...  hmmm?!)  Perhaps because all of the little toddler tables at school are her butt height...  just a guess.  ;)

 

I hope you are laughing today! 

**Oh and Zoey looks only a teensy bit different now than in these pictures.  She cut her hair last week.  She crawled under the dining room table and snipped a piece with those blasted red safety scissors...  she really didn't do much damage.  She had a real hair appt scheduled for Friday anyway.  So, Jenna merely cut the wispy part into the frame of her face.  You can't even really tell.  It looks sort of styled - if you squint.  and ... IF Zoey lets me run a comb through her hair...  so really, yeah, she looks the same.  ;) 

First Day of Preschool

 

The day has finally come.  Preschool.  Sweet Zoey is four years old and currently at her first day of preschool. 

 

She woke up early and was dressed and ready to go (complete with backpack on) before 8 a.m.  She was none too pleased that she had to wait four and a half hours!!  :)  We ate breakfast.  Watched a little TV.  Then daddy came back home to surprise her with a little gift.

 

A Princess balloon that says "Daring to Dream" and a little Boots.

John had to take his Dad to Columbus for an appointment and I think he was feeling a bit upset that he'd miss this big milestone. 

 

In order to take up some time, Zoey and I ran a few errands in town (pay the cell bill, grab a smoothie).  When we came home it was time for PBSkids' newest cartoon.  Daniel Tiger's neighborhood.  Yep, Mr. Roger is back in a bit of a different way.... Between phone calls and whatnot, I missed parts of it.  :(  But what I did see...  "Daniel goes to School"  made me well up inside.  Daniel and his friends...  Did you know Lady Elaine grew up and had a daughter named Miss Alaina (sp?)?!  the King is back... and owl too...  The trolley takes the characters around.  The song is what hit home.  ... a bit different...  but Daniel does take off his shoes.....  ::sniff, sniff::

 

We've been looking at Daniel on the internet for some time now, but I never let it sink in how much the story is the same.  Times change, but things basically remain the same....  I'm pretty sure the real Mr. McFeely does the voice at the end....  :)

 

But back to reality...  current reality.  

 

Grandma Joyce stopped by after lunch to say hi and wish Zoey well.  I tried to take some pictures - knowing I wouldn't be able to force myself into the classroom (yes, the teachers allowed parents in... but I didn't want to be 'that' parent... even though I probably should have.  Zoey wouldn't even have noticed and I would have had better pictures.)  I would have liked to have seen where her backpack is hung. ;)

 

The pictures I did get...  well, they are very much Zoey!

 

She said the sun was too bright...  that and she's just not interested in photos.  ;)

The cat looking on....

Hello Kitty and some puffy paint (found in a cabinet somehwere) do just the trick.



Waiting.  This preschool has a very elaborate system of pick up and drop off.  I'm told it streamlines everything once people get used to it.  That and the parking lot is TINY.  :)  Zoey's room is in the basement of the church - off to the right.  See...  Zoey is my lucky number 7!  :)



My sweet girl.  In the car as we waited. 

Zoey was so excited!  She had that calm sense about her, however.  She was determined to show her teacher the Boots toy - I told her she could show it, but leave him in the car...  no toys at school (until show and tell).  "Your school has its own toys - special school toys."  But... Bunny Bun Bun still played stowaway in her backpack...  I'm hoping the teachers leave him in there!  :)  **I'll have to remember to check and make sure he gets home tonight!!

Zoey was so ready.  She got out of the car so fast that I had to remind her to take her backpack... 

:::Now, my nose starts to crinkle/itch... my eyes turn a bit foggy.... as I think, I didn't get to give her a hug.  :(  She was out the door and running...  I had to drive around the corner and across the way to find a damn parking space - in the grass....  by the time I made it back to her classroom, she was seated and playing....


 She's my big girl now. 

 There were many parents and even a Grandma taking pictures - crying.  I tried to grab some shots as she hung her name up on the door...  but everything was blurry.  Her little body hidden around doors, other people.  I never did get to see her name, her backpack...  I don't even know if the teachers found her family photo in her folder.  (Her first "assignment" was to bring a family picture to class...  In true family tradition, we waited until last night to take a picture... in bad light...  with no thought to makeup on Mama, or fancy clothes on any of us...  perfect none the less!  Just us.)

She was so ready.  I know John and I have done a good job preparing her for this next step... 

But, selfishly, I haven't done a thing to prepare myself...  Case in point...  I've been craving TIME.  Time for myself.  Time to get things "done."  Time to be a person - not just a mom or wife.  And what have I done on this my first hours away....  carpel tunnel's got nothing on my computered arms and crooked back!  HA! 

I have about one hour until pick up now...  and still so many options.... I haven't a clue where to start looking for ME.  Perhaps I'll tackle that tomorrow.

Preschool Preview

This afternoon Zoey and I had our first taste of what preschool looks like.  We were invited to attend a scavenger hunt and storytime date.  This was a nice opportunity to meet some of the parents and kids in her class. 

Zoey was super excited.  She picked out her own outfit and couldn't wait to go.  At first I told her we'd go after lunch... well, the appointed time was 2:00-2:45 p.m., so after we ate our lunch she put her shoes on, grabbed some of her toys and told me it was time to go.  "You said 'after lunch'!"  This kid notices it all, I tell ya!

We read some of the Dora books she got for her birthday in the hour we still had to wait.  She yawned during points...  as did I.  Not because the books were bed...  just because it was nearing 2 p.m. - the time she normally takes a nap.  Yep, her preschool class overlaps her nap.  We have been dragging out play times to 3p.m. or so on different days just to see how it'll all go down.  Some days skipping naps altogether.  We have good days and bad doing both.  So, I think she'll adjust just fine. 

When we finally got to the church, I showed her which door to go in...  and she was ready.  She didn't run off like a kid that had been "freed" from mom's overbearing rule.  Nope, she just walked along with me eager to see the next adventure.  I felt pretty good about that.

Once inside, she didn't hesitate to say Hello and scope out the room.  She found the corner with the toys and started taking them off the shelves to play.  My first instinct was to make her stop and stand with me... but I figured the teachers would tell her if she wasn't allowed to play.  And I was also scoping out my own things...  how these ladies talk to the kids, how they react, etc.  That and I didn't want to be "that" mom...which of course, I end up being a weirdo no matter what... explained in a moment.

We all waited around for more kids to show up, but alas, only four kids participated today.  It wasn't required or anything, so I suppose many parents didn't think it was a big deal... especially if the kid had been in the 3 year old class last year. 

There were two other girls and a boy.  The two girls knew each other and were good huggy friends.  The poor little boy was so nervous and scared; he never left Mom's side (until later). 

Her teacher leading the song.  Her class aid/co-teacher is the brunette on the green circle in front.

 The kids were asked to take a seat on the fancy shape carpet.  The teacher read a book about "I'm going bear hunting" (not sure of the title exactly, but think of the ol' camp song and there you have it).  There were more red shirts (aka staff) than kids.  We, Moms, hung back and watched.  They all clapped and repeated the words.  Very cute.   Zoey got into it.  She didn't really get the exact clapping actions (legs, legs, hands, hands), but she did have the beat at times (legs, hands, legs, hands).  She was interactive and expressive, as always. 

After the story, the kids were introduced to the scavenger hunt list.  The list was done well as each item was pictured and written out.  I thought it was a cute attention to detail that the items were arranged in rainbow color order.  The teacher went over each item and asked the kids about them.

While they were doing that, one of the other staff members came over to me and asked if Zoey was mine.  She remarked how smart she was, how mature she was, and asked her age and if she had any siblings.  I said she turned four on Friday and as for the siblings thing, "Just us, " I said.  That made me proud.  I know Zoey is amazing, but I always kept in the back of my head that perhaps everyone feels like that about her own child...  hearing a stranger say those things within 15 minutes of meeting her was awesome.  :) 

The kids each got a paper bag and the extra teachers took them outside while the moms talked with the ladies who would be our class teacher and aid and the director.  I put Zoey's hat on her head and away she went to get in line.  The little boy was so scared he didn't want to go.  I asked Zoey if she would go over and ask him to come out with her.  She was very happy to do so...  he didn't take the bait however.  But the teachers noticed that she asked and thanked her for doing so.

The adults discussed a bit about the upcoming water day and August parent orientation.  A few minutes into that the little boy's mom came back in alone.  (Small victories, right.)  :) 

During our talk, the snack was being prepped.  My gut flipped when I saw they were going to hand out Oreos.  And she's going to nap after this?! I thought.  I said nothing.  But when the girl poured some toxic green "juice" out into the little plastic cups, I politely asked if Zoey could just have water.  They didn't care, of course, even mentioning some kids always prefer water and that they have a bottled water dispenser in the room.  Sweet!  I talked to her teacher about Zoey and "staying hydrated" - she seemed to be cool about it.  I know a few nasty cookies now and then is totally cool for my kid.  I just will have to find out a bit more about what snacks are usually given out.  The parents are responsible for snacks usually... so we could have a myriad of things.  I just hope a majority of the other parents think apples and even crackers are better than Oreos on most days.  And I know she can always have water!  :)   (btw, the school is peanut free...  hmmm...  apples and... string cheese?  yogurt?!  hummus! veggies and dip.  crackers and cheese.  even goldfish for crikey sake!) 

Yes, I did let her eat the two Oreos she was given.  I'm not a mean mother.  I just hope more parents and teachers think about stuff like this.  (I'm also hoping that this was a "treat" or special food because it wasn't a "real" class.... I hope!) 

Oh, and it didn't help that as we were leaving they handed out GIANT boxes of Nerds candy...directly to the kids.  The director must have felt my spirit fall at that one, because she joked that they had so many boxes left over (from the carnival in May, I guess) they "had to do something with them"....grrrreat.  But then I just had Zoey read the box to figure out what candy was inside...  everything is a learning/teaching moment. 

That, and I like Nerds....  ;)